I actually went through a similar experience a few years ago. My story:
I had a good job in finance, was making good money, and probably could've stayed there for a long time. Even worse, I was actually pretty good at my job. I had a specialized niche that happened to be in demand at that time.
However, I noticed clouds on the horizon. I was not excited about my work (economist at a i-bank). At first I thought this was normal - like who likes work, right? Work is hard for everyone - suck it up. That's what everyone says.
But I'll tell you a secret. It's just not true. If you want to really achieve something professionally in your life, you will need to have a passion for your work. In fact my situation was more extreme. I felt there was something in my soul that really wasn't being realized, and it wasn't just making me sad, it was literally killing me. My health was failing. I had daily stomach acid problems, I wasn't sleeping. I couldn't hold a relationship. I couldn't even dream of starting a family in this state. What kind of life is this?
How could this happen? I had always been a hard-worker. Doesn't hard work always win? Isn't that America (India and China too)? Isn't that what drives us and our economies? No. In fact, it's not about work at all. In all my years of schooling, I never learned how to fine tune my intuition to my own emotional well-being. I never learned what makes me happy.
Passion isn't about "work", because if you truly loved it, you wouldn't call it work.
The problem here is that the harder-worker you are, the worse you are punished in society. The lazy people quit on day one and then bum around Europe for a year. I pushed yourself harder and harder into an area because I saw it as a challenge. But I didn't realize what my passion was.
Over the years, as I got older, I was trying to hammer my round brain into a square shape. And guess what? It can't be done.
And the result? You end up burnt out and overworked and exhausted. The worst part about it - after near 10 years in analytical work - any innovative thought had been hammered out of me. The idea of finding my passion seemed impossible.
So I went to my boss. I wanted to shift gears - "can you help me?" I asked. Can I focus on something else? Learn new skills. Of course not, he said. We hired you to do your job. This is banking, not an NGO.
So I left. I didn't get angry. I understand - companies hire people to do jobs, not help them realize your dreams. But I have 40 years more left of "work" before retirement, and with no family, it was worth the gamble to figure it out:
I wrote down things I needed to do:
Stop blaming myself. Our schools are horrible at developing our passions; we are left to our own devices on figuring out what we love to do. In fact, school actively works against what we love. I noticed the best people in my high school class often had jumped down the same rabbit hole as me and were miserable now. I'd say about 50-60% of people I know dislike their job. People whom truly "found their passion" and enjoying their careers often got poor grades because they were busy cultivating their passions at that age.
Figure out what makes me tick. I had no idea how to do this, but I realized it was absolutely critical for figuring out the next step.
Both these steps were critical before jumping into something new. Self-loathing would just make me more desperate. And finding your passion - however hard - is important.
So I ended up trying a bunch of stuff. I literally wrote down a checklist - online courses, travel, dating, meetups, projects, books, small jobs, coaching, psychological testing, classes, you name it - spanning over a period of 5 years. I would make money where I could, but my 5-year project was to figure out my passion and where I fit in the world.
I lived in Asia for two years doing teaching and consulting gigs. Adopting to a new culture and language is incredibly challenging, but it pushes you to be creative in communicating, living, surviving. You're essentially wingin' it every day. I found I love teaching, curriculum design, and communicating with people, and working with startups and innovation. Check.
I took courses. Every type of course out there - I knew I loved technology, so programming, product development, analytics, cartooning. I went to meetups and talks. Who was my "tribe"? Who did I respect? Who did I want to be like?
Personality tests. Yeah, they are one-dimensional. But keep at it, and you start to see patterns. Take a bunch of them. Myers-Brigg works. This blog article can help too:
http://blog.hypeinnovation.com/four-personalities-that-determine-innovation-success-or-failure
Don't rely on one. Take a bunch, over a period of time.
Yeah, you can consider it career coach, but they aren't the end-all. My coach was picking up on a few themes: people-focused, systems-focused, and a builder. The tests were calling me "architect". She was thinking I should be a coach.
So I tested all these ideas out. I started going to design-related events. I read architecture books. I started doing coaching on the side for free. I started drawing buildings, then websites, then mobile apps. I took a UX design course.
Boom. It was the buried treasure. Understanding people + design + systems + startups. It worked.
AND it complemented well with my business analytics background. CHECK.
So that's where I'm at in my journey. I still got a long way to go. I'm at the halfway mark of my 5-year journey. I've spent tons of money on courses and trying new things.
It wasn't - and isn't - always a smooth ride. I woke up feeling doubts numerous times. People will think you're crazy. People will doubt you.
Even well-meaning family and friends ["you had such a great job, so much potential ... why throw it away?" - you will hear this ad nauseam].
Just tune it out.
Sometimes you'll look for mentors and they'll be helpful. Others will knock you down. Some don't like the idea that you can jump into their field on a whim. They will knock you down. I guarantee you this will happen. There is something deeply psychological about jobs and careers in America. We throw our entire lives into it, and we become sensitive when people threaten our space.
Don't listen to them, and don't give up. Keep confident in yourself. It's a boxing match, one where you need to have total confidence in your decision, but in the end, it's like Rocky said: it's not about how hard you punch, it's about how hard you can get punched and keep getting back up.
After all this work, I feel like I'm running on the right highway. And every step is worth it. My health is better, my spirits are up, and I can even see myself starting a family someday soon.
You don't need to travel around the world to do this. You don't even need to quit your job or travel like I did. That's a bit extreme for your situation.
But you need to plot out a journey. Maybe it's 6 months, maybe its 5 years. Talk about it with your family. Make sure they are on board. Involve them on your exploration. Then ...
Start exploring. Don't make hasty decisions without testing it. Treat it like a UX design project. TEST at a small scale first. Take a course first, join clubs, do meetups, and push yourself outside your comfort level.
Don't quit your job just yet. Just do it on the side. Stick to the schedule, don't rush it. Keep getting positive feedback from your family. You already have a good support infrastructure. Use it to your advantage. And edge forward, one step at a time.